The last one tho 💀 Like, the ship is already DECEASED at the bottom of the ocean, ya’ll did not need to cast Vicious Mockery on its corpse 😭 old timey gallows humor was ruthless but GOD it was funny
EDIT: Hey guys, I found the original thread, there’s even more roasts in there!
Disasters like the Titanic weren’t particularly weird events 100 years ago. People were living the Cambrian Explosion of mechanics, crazy shit, died all sorts of horrific ways, like drowning in hot molasses. A dozen people die in a UPS plane crash or in a single Russian attack; Front page news. In the day; “Heard a dozen men were buried alive in the local coal mine today. Shame that. What’s for dinner?”
Guess what made this event stick out was the braggadocio. Unsinkable my ass. Also, wasn’t that a ship of unusual size? “I don’t believe they exist.” Also, lots of prominent people went down, and there were plenty of survivors to tell the tale. Imagine an over-hyped space plane exploding with Musk, Bezos, Zuckerberg, et al. onboard.
I’ll never understand why they didn’t make the compartment bulkheads go all the way to the ceiling.
It was kind of the Titanic to provide a ballroom for the mermaids
It’s true, though. Everyone adores the seashell bra wearing sexy shallow water mermaids, but the deep sea eldritch horror mermaids need love, too.
You know that the swimming pool on the titanic was built so well, that it’s still full to this day?
Unfortunately for them, Titanic had no ballroom.
Don’t let Trump hear that.
Are these real? I cannot validate these quotes and never heard of this before. Image searches reveal only a single Tumblr source of the images. I don’t have access to really any paper databases this old though.
EDIT: Seems legit!
Actually I was able to fact check this in a matter of literal seconds.
edit: clearer example from a different article. Lots of sites have a paywall, but you can usually see enough to verify that everything lines up. The library of congress has a lot of old newspapers (for now), but I wasn’t able to find any of these there yet
bro with the buzzer beater to save the post, actual GOAT
Maybe I have trust issues but it’s satisfying knowing that I learned something new today that really happened. It broadens my perspective on what social media actually introduced.
I can’t get it to it because I don’t have a subscription to this site and there’s a paywall when visited with my iPhone, but thank you! Close enough. Wish I could pull the whole page. I’ll look into it later.
You’re better than I am!
No problem. I didn’t mean to imply any criticism of either your fact checking or especially your initial skepticism, which I fully support. I am just delighted that it’s true.
The source is apparently a Twitter post that is now deleted because I assume the accounts of both of those people were deleted thanks to the enshittification of the site.
Ice cold 😂
Way to kick a guy when he’s down at the bottom of the Atlantic.
ET TU, BRUTE??? 😭😭
Jesus Christ, I don’t think I’ve ever seen these. Merciless.
Wow early 20th century journalists were fucking savages
The only time you’ll see this type of humor nowadays is on either The Onion-like websites, which is not real news, or indie news sources.
I hate corporate media.
The Onion has been way too real lately I’d say
They’re not the Simpsons. They’re not predicting stuff or anything. They just think of the craziest reality possible, and then reality turns out worse.
The jokes all moved to the comment sections. Well not Facebook, you can get arrested for those.
Outsourcing your jokes to regular people is crazy work ngl
I have to recommend the podcast series Titanic: Ship of Dreams
H. L. Mencken has joined the chat.
That’s the first thing I see. Mega yikes. 😬
Much like Churchill I can’t agree with absolutely everything he said, but damn if he didn’t have a lot of incredibly insightful zingers. When he hits the nail, he does so with a sledgehammer.
I highly recommend the Devil’s Dictionary too. It remains as relevant and darkly humorous as when it was written.
I don’t get the one about poets.
I don’t think they had the vocabulary to describe the concept of a memelord back then, so guessing that ‘poets’ would be the next best descriptor for someone who does funny things with words.
Basically “If the survivors knew how badly the Titanic was going to get memed on, they might have wished they died there instead.”
Poets is being used very much tongue-in-cheek
Certainly possible, but I tend to think something else, assuming the quote is real. I think it’s literally about bad poetry. In the collective grief after the sinking, undoubtedly many people who were not and would never be professional poets attempted to write something in memoriam. Some of these were undoubtedly published in various papers. This blurb has the feel of a Twain or Bierce or especially a Mencken, where an educated cynic is calling out the earnest-but-unskilled for their lack of self-awareness in thinking they had a quality contribution to the public discussion.
I see, I see… makes sense. (Still very poor taste, to joke on such a tragedy)
Interesting take for someone with your username, I figured you’d be thrilled!
